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Nikipedia: Live Blogging From Denver Two Weeks Late
Here I am, coming to you from The Mile-High City, bringing you my take on politics in the midst of this exciting political atmosphere!
Actually, I have no “take.” And that’s unfortunate, because I feel like this is the first time in my life that I can hold discussions with adults about politics. But it’s not that I “can” hold them. I “may” hold them. And that’s the problem.
I don’t really know what I’m talking about when it comes to politics. To be honest, I just questioned whether or not I should capitalize “politics.” That’s where I’m coming from here.
However, despite my overall ignorance of Politics, I do know that I like Obama. A lot. But I worry that it might be for the same reason I would wear a Yankees hat proudly… because I think it’s cute.
I don’t mean to infer that I think Obama is cute. I do, but that’s not all I like about him. I don’t need to go into why else I like him (mostly because I couldn’t even if I wanted to), but everyone knows why everyone likes Obama.
His name reminds people of the Bahamas.
So clearly, I have no business discussing or debating politics. But I’ve been doing it a lot. I got into a heated debate the other night in Raleigh, NC after a show. It was with a gentleman who, oddly enough, was once the winner of a Yankees Fans reality show. I forget the name of it and would look it up for you, but I don’t care enough about this fellow to do that.
After the show, this man and I struck up a conversation about Obama. I mentioned his speech made me cry. He scoffed at me. I continued to explain that although it’s not the ONLY reason to pick your president, I think it’s extremely important for our leader to be a strong speaker.
He disagreed and the debate got even heated-er.
I condescendingly explained to him what “conjugating a verb” meant and he snapped. He moved towards me and attempted a lame swat at my arm, exclaiming “I’VE BEEN ON NATIONAL TV! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!?”
My friend stepped in and I escorted him downstairs before he caught a lame punch in the face. We took refuge in the bar while the national television star was kicked out.
The guy was drunk. One could argue I wasn’t sober, but that’s not the point. The point is that I should have kept my mouth shut. Sometimes I feel invincible as a girl. I’m aware that a guy could very well punch me in the face, but then I’d win. He’s the bully that punched a girl who he just paid $18 to see.
He reminded me of the man Sen. Fred Thompson described in a speech earlier this week: “In high school and the Naval Academy, he earned a reputation as a troublemaker, but as John points out, he wasn’t just a troublemaker. He was the leader of the troublemakers.”
Aka: Bully.
I look forward to four more years of swirlies!
Nikki Glaser is a stand-up comedian living in Los Angeles. Go to www.myspace.com/nikkiglaser for info.
Tags: barack obama, columns, denver, Fight, nikipedia, nikki glaser, politics
September 11th, 2008 at 1:08 pm
The bully winds up to slug Nikki.
Friend: “Whoa! Hey, whatcha doing, buddy?”
Bully: “I’m punching this blonde girl in the face. I paid my $18, so now I want to punch her.”
Friend: “What are you talking about?”
Bully: “This is the room for ‘Punch a blonde girl in the face’ isn’t it?”
Friend: “No, no, no! This is ‘Listen to a blonde girl tell funny jokes.’ For what you want, do the following: Leave the bar, walk to the nearest police station and tell them you are too drunk and stupid to be wandering about in public.”
Nikki and friend discreetly leave while the bully realizes he’s been insulted, by which time the bar staff deal with him.
** Dramatic reenactment — May not have happened.